Day 11: 21 Day Parenting Challenge

Your Inner Being feels no limit.

So, anything that feels like limits is something that you have self-imposed.

abraham-hicks

Challenge: Free yourself of all of the "shoulds" and "supposed-to's".

This is a big one. Just imagine what it would be like to set yourself free of all of the self-imposed rules that live by. Your unconscious is jam-packed with them. In order to be conscious and to make decisions that are genuinely right for us, we have to first strip away what is NOT ours. Remember the onion?

So, let's make a list.

What are all the supposed to's and shoulds that you are dragging around with you. Make this list specifically about yourself. 

Here are some of my own, mixed in with other dear ones I know...

I am supposed to:

::cook homemade meals and not rely on any packaged food

::stay in touch with friends and family, including remembering birthdays and thank you cards

::have a clean house

::be thin and toned (and it was supposed to happen within about 6 weeks of giving birth)

::want to take breaks from my children ("you have to look after yourself, you know")

::go on "dates" with my husband ("you have to take time for your relationship, you know")

(or the opposite-you are supposed to NOT want to take breaks and you are a horrible mother if you do)

::enjoy playing whatever game my kids want to play and never feel bored or uninterested

::look great and have cute clothes (or maybe I've got a little of the opposite going on where I'm supposed not look great because that means I'm spending time on my appearance when I should be playing with my kids?? hmmm)

:: guess what people want (and give it to them) without hearing any specific request (the underground style of communication that we are all so used to dealing with!)

::be knowledgeable about current events and able to discuss them (or maybe some of you have the should of not discussing current events and only talking about your kids)

::always be empathic and never talk about myself

::be enlightened

::look younger than I do

::not need anything from anyone

::be happy all the time

::enjoy complaining about my kids and need to "vent"

::never drink caffeine or eat sugar

Oh the list goes on. Grab a pen and start writing your list (or write your list here, if you are willing to share.) There will be many shoulds that you aren't even conscious of, which limit you without your awareness. The way to shine the light on these is to notice in your body when you feel ANY kind of constriction. There's a should (limiting belief) under there somewhere. 

Let's bust down those brick walls.

Comments

[kris laroche]

angela.
that is a whole lot for you. you are full of passion and light and belief and hope. i was reading a quote from robert gonzales from non-violent communication work and he suggests that we hold our needs (clean house and safe, peaceful world) both passionately AND lightly. feeling the life energy flow through us because of our precious needs and also letting go of attachment to any outcome. with love to you and your beautiful family.

[Angela]

working on this one... the list is many, plus the big weight of saving the world, seriously, i can't stop thinking of all the big picture social, environmental, and political changes that i want to take place and feel it is somehow my role to be a part of that big picture change or else what world am i leaving to my children. so i guess my list goes from a clean house to a better, safer, peaceful world, oh my, maybe that is too much to bear.

[gen]

Too many to list here but I posted them on my blog. Reading these ones, I am tempted to go and add a few more.

[Christie]

* start working on the garden
* spend less time on the 'puter
* spell stuff out
* capitalize (or not)
* sew more
* read more non-fiction
* do something with my hair
* know what I am doing
* spend more time doing more academic homeschool stuff
* spend less time trying to get daughter to do academic homeschool stuff
* worrying about getting other people's approval
* get more exercise
* go back to work
* worry about all the stuff I am supposed to do.

Aha. That feels good. Here little spot in the webiverse, you hold these shoulds for me awhile.

[Teri]

Love it.

Take care of everyone else's needs before my own.

Never argue in front of my kid.

Spend less time in front of the computer.

Get thank you notes out in a more timely manner.

Not be so concerned about the clothes that I put on my daughter!

Not be so concerned about the clothes I put on myself!

Have a retirement and/or financial plan.

etc etc etc.

Good to question these things!