Feeleez continually amazes me for its potency with children and their feelings. Here Elliott just walked up to it one day and told me how he feels when I get mad at him and when he gets mad at me. That is information I want. I want to know all about what is going on inside these new people.
Seeing that little guy on the poster and imagining that as Elliott when I'm mad, that leaves me tender. I will still get mad, and yet, having that image in my mind may shift the quality of my feelings towards him. Empathy shuffles itself right up behind the anger which helps me tend our bond through the storm.
He looks and feels different after telling me.
Saschy does too. Tonight I was asking her questions about her feelings using the poster.
How do you feel when I yelled at you today and put you down hard on the couch?
How was I feeling in that moment?
How do you feel when we nurse?
How do you feel now?
How do you feel when Papi comes home?
She pointed and paused and pointed with each question. I didn't say much other than asking simple open ended questions. With just that, a space is created for everyone to be themselves, to describe and reflect and get curious and express.
It is a powerful tool. If you have Feeleez and want to know more about how to use it in your own home more effectively for conflict resolution, diffusing strong emotions, processing big events and building connection, you can purchase the Feeleez Learning Guide which is a downloadable document. I am also glad to answer questions or offer suggestions in the comment section here. If Feeleez is in your school and you see that the teachers may want to learn more about teaching children empathy and resolving conflicts peacefully, then we could arrange a workshop or phone consultation for those teachers. Email me for more information.
I had almost forgotten how Feeleez works. It's here in our home every day and we may go weeks without using it. Then, something happens, and we walk to the poster, and I remember. I love Feeleez and I feel so glad to be part of this business.
xxoo
Oh I just love *seeing* kids using the poster! Every time our girls do, I think, "Well, it's just so amazing!"
Today, at the parent-teacher conference, Natalie and I ended up showing Xi's teacher how we use the poster for "conflict resolution". Her eyes widened as the possibilities began to churn through her mind. She concluded that she needed to move the plant away from that part of the wall, and lower the poster. And then we discussed coming and giving a demonstration to the class one day soon.
So glad you (and we) are a part of this business, too!
Be well,
Nathan
Posted by: Locallocale.wordpress.com | March 31, 2011 at 11:38 PM