







I feel such a stunning array of emotions during this month of falling...
::delight breathing in deep lungfulls of moist, crisp air which tastes like the color orange
::blissful overwhelm with the abundance of apples, plums, tomatoes, potatoes, nourishment from the earth in every shade and flavor begging to be pickled, frozen, dried, somehow tenderly kept longer than just this one moment of ripeness
::spilling over gratitude for days like this past rainy sunday of cider pressing with friends, drinking in the golden brown explosion of fresh sweetness and laughing along the hours of turning the weathered crank and scooping bucketfulls of pomme de mush
::timid dread for the months of darkness ahead, bundled inside separate houses, each of us alone in our little world of children, struggling to convince chubby toes to wear tights and boots and layers and layers and layers
::fierce determination to keep us all healthy, already seeing that the forces of seasonal change are bigger than my dropperfull of echinacea, trusting that winter is an immune builder somehow
::excitement for holiday plans to drive north to be with family
::joyful for the creativity of making holiday things, starting already
::restless which seems to be a fall thing for me, resisting the earth's wisdom to call me inside myself, to embrace quieter rhythms, to trust the cycle of death and darkness and let that be too, instead wanting to flee on travel adventures, to shift and heave and demand even bigger changes, to shed old skins like the trees letting loose their leaves
::eager to celebrate and honour, like the leaves call to bring forth their most stunning display before they set themselves free of all earthly bonds
::sad to let go of the dreams of summer which never came to bear fruit
::and happy, to be here, feeling these feelings, riding the waves, with two strong legs and a beating heart with fingers that smell like pumpkins and apples.